Blog 2119 – 07.14.2021
She Is On Her Way, My Queen of Hearts
She may not be coming around the mountain when she comes as the song says because there are no mountains between Houston, Texas and Norfolk, Nebraska, but she is coming. I am so glad and grateful for I have missed her so, my lovely and loving wife, Linda, is on her way. She will take her time driving and will probably stay over night in motels along the way a couple of nights as I did driving up the end of May, but should be here by Friday.
The anticipation of seeing the one you love after even a brief separation helps us appreciate our connection. As Mama God in The Shack tells Mack, “Love was always meant to be in relationship.” Of all the wonderful dynamics in family the best lesson mothers and fathers can teach their sons and daughters is the joy of a one on one relationship. Men often are not good with relationships, but mothers and daughters are great teachers of husbands and fathers.
I shared with a young man at work the other day about my first walk with my baby daughter, forty-one years ago tomorrow. That chapter from the book that I wrote about her, Emily, The Little Girl Who Sang Her Song To Anyone Who Came Along, is featured on this blog and is called, My First Walk With Emily. The piece has a picture of a baby doll that looks a lot she did as and infant. Fathers and their daughters, mothers and their sons are special relationships indeed, but they are primarily training for the highest relationship, the one typified in Native American culture by that of Father Sky and Mother Earth. Western religion with it’s Patriarchal overtones misses the mark a bit I think in this regard. All kinds of misunderstandings regarding woman’s true role stem from over emphasizing man’s role. As great philosopher James Brown and self-proclaimed hardest working man in music, put it succinctly. “This is a man’s world man wouldn’t be nothing without a woman or a girl.” I grew up in a very narrow Christian fundamentalist sect that though they said they honored girls and women still saw them only in subservient roles. I believe history teaches us that most men are afraid of powerful and equal women and choose to label, them, witches, bitches, or just mad. Women are not evil nor crazy, except for putting up so long with men’s nonsense.
Silly men who actually wrote the creation fable and have long claimed God did, believe because in the made up tale that they were created first that their less they one day seniority gives them control over their “lesser” halves. Nonsense, as I heard a lady preacher once say, “After God had created everything else, he created man, and then he said, ‘I can do better than that,’ and then he created woman.” The true true is that neither male nor female is superior but part of the whole. Love was always meant to be in relationship.
Even as single people we are gifted with a human brain with two sides, male and female, rational and intuitive. Not conflicting as some think but complimentary. In relationship we are forced to see things from those two different perspectives and we are bigger, better for it.
Adam without his Eve was only a lonely man. Father Sky without Mother Earth is distant, incomplete, and irritable, thundering out impossible to keep commandments and requiring blood sacrifices to atone. Jesus they say came to show us another side of God, but Jesus was also a man. His mother Mary, called by some Christians, the mother of God, is seldom ever portrayed as more than a vessel, breeding stock. Some theologians even site scripture saying women can only be saved by bearing children. Hence the very patriarchal position that women should be forced to have children even if they are raped and should have no choice in the matter.
I married a woman not just lovely and loving but with a mind, not superior to my own, though she may disagree, but in every way equal. I must admit the rational side of her brain works quite well, but the intuitive side is better developed than my own and I have learned to rely on her faster analysis of situations and people using it. I often say that my daughter Emily taught me far more than I ever taught her, the same is true of my wife, and my son.
If you think I have wandered too far afield, perhaps you are right. I do my best wandering with my life long companion. She is coming to see me and I am so excited. Linda, it was you I was searching for all of my life, all my relationship were preparing me for this wonderful one with you. I am so glad and grateful that we found each other. Like in the movie we both know and love, What Dreams May Come, it was inevitable. I can hardly wait for our next lifetime so I can find you all over again, but for the time being I will continue to bask in the bliss of having found my true love now. How happy I am that she is on her way.
Your friend and fellow traveler,