Blog 1388 – 07.08.2019
Words Of Wisdom
“Being happy without a partner is the best way to draw one.” It is the job of us self-appointed speakers, poets, writers, and singers to share words of wisdom and the preceding quote from a book by my friend and fellow speaker and author, Mike Dooley, in his recent book to his young daughter entitled, “A Beginners Guide To The Universe: A Guide To Living An Uncommonly Happy Life” is exactly the kind of thing that I am talking about. Mike and I both have a gift or curse (You decide) for preferring and picking long titles. That is because we realize that many people in these email, text, and tweet days read so little and have such short attention spans and the title may be all they read, so we want to tell it all in the title.
I took two years of journalism in high school and I still recall that newspaper reporters were taught to put the five W’s and H (The Who, What, When, Where, Why, and How of a Story) in the lead, the first paragraph. We were also taught that headlines were supposed to be grabbers, designed to tempt a reader to read the article beneath it. Titles too serve that purpose sometimes.
I have, as we all have, picked up a few words of wisdom along the way and we hope to pass them along to as many we can. Songs, as I have shared before, are a great way to impart wisdom because music hath charms to soothe the savage beast and to slip past ole ego who always has his “buts” out and ready to use to keep us from hearing and believing the truth about him and his confusing take on everything from why we should not love ourselves or anyone or thing too much (A truly impossible feat) to Who and Whose we truly are (For if we find that out his power over us is done.) You are not your puny little ego as he or she would have you to believe. You and I are way bigger and better than that.
Another great way to pass on our learned lessons is through humor and jokes. One of my all time favorite comedians, George Carlin, was a Master at that and there are many others living today, but there is always room for more who can condense into a funny line or two a great truth that will stick in the heart and head.
“Two bulls were walking along having escaped their farmer’s field through a downed portion of the fence. They walked and walked down the long and winding country road. Finally the large bull stopped exhausted, but the smaller bull went on further and further down the road. The point of the story is. Yes, you guessed it: ‘A little bull will go a long way.’” And don’t we know it with another race for the White House already underway.
But briefly (Too late for that) back to the quote in the first line of this piece. There are so many Elenor Rigby(s) (male and female) out there in the world, lonely people, living solitary, and a bit desperate lives wishing they had a partner but not realizing that exuding “neediness” is a surefire way to make sure they never find one or one that is wrong for them. Hence today’s words of wisdom, a condensed nugget of truth, that learning to be happy without a partner is the best way to draw one. Happy and fulfilled is the best way to draw a partner who also is both. Behaving broken and needy draws if any that same kind of partner, the last thing anyone seeking true companionship needs. Funny Girl Barbra Streisand had a hit song with People Who Need People (being per the song – the luckiest people in the world) but trained psychologist will tell you otherwise, needy people are indeed the most unlucky people in the world. Feeling friendless, partnerless, and alone, and showing such a neediness becomes a sort of self-fulfilling prophesy often if not always.
As the Psalmist David himself often a sufferer of loneliness, depression, and displaying some think probably symptoms of being a bit bipolar wrote, “Surely, Goodness and Mercy will follow me all the days of my life, three angels always by his side and ours. And then there is Me, Myself, and I, another dynamic trio. I am not being flippant, till we quit saying silly things like, “I never eat out or go to a movie by myself” (You never have been nor are ever truly alone) we will find ourself living solitary lives. But when we learn to be not only comfortable doing things on our own but happy and content in our own company we will not have to get up early or stay up late to find a little “me time.” And would not that be preferable to being and acting like hermits most of the time knocking about in a big empty house and life? Been there done that, haven’t we all? Here’s to finding everyone a partner that wants one, and learning to dance by ourselves first and then seeing how many partners show up asking for the next dance. I am grateful that I have a lovely and loving life partner. I hope each of you does too, if you want one. If you do and have not found him or her yet, remember the best way to draw a partner to you is my learning to be happy and content without a partner and dancing alone. People who already know how to be happy, to be content, and how to dance make the best partners. Today’s picture is of Roy Rogers and Dale Evans. I am so glad they found one another.
Your friend and fellow traveler,
Part time match maker,
Full time dancer,