Blog 1345 – 05.26.2019
Three Day Weekend With The Girl Of My Dreams
I have dreamed of lovely girls for as long as I can remember throughout this life and probably countless other lives that I cannot just now readily recall. But there is one, Linda Lee Stokes, that I have now spent the greater part of my life married to and it is she that I intend to spend the rest of this journey with. (Note: To You grammar geeks: If dangling prepositions are a problem for you I apologize but I do often think and write in dangling prepositions so I hope you can get over it and excuse me.)
That I have loved other girls and probably will others (guys too, though girls seem easier to get close to for me) is a given but none more intimately nor more completely than my Linda Lee. Seven years ago I began working away from my long time home base in Houston, Texas. And actually a couple of years before that Linda and I had sort of separated. I think we sort of intended to divorce, a new experience for her but one that I had already known three times. But, we kept putting it off and she would come to visit me, most of the places that I worked, if I was there more than a few weeks. On one two week assignment in Birmingham, Alabama she actually did drive over to see me before I was off to begin and complete a long stint in Wisconsin, over two years.
Linda is a very private person and I am a writer of all things and not a private person at all. She will not care much for this blog as she will think I am sharing “her business” but sharing is a writer’s business and what we do, hopefully well enough, lovingly enough, and entertainingly enough not to ruffle too many feathers. I love my Linda, and everyone of you, and never set out on purpose to offend or intentionally hurt, disappoint, or oppose anyone. Love is never like that, ego yes, but love no.
Last summer I was in Minnesota working when I began to have some serious medical problems. During that time Linda drove up to spend a few days with me. We thought my problem was getting better and so she was on her way back when I had another episode. She drove over half way back to be there for me and see me through. I cannot tell you how much that meant to me. It also helped me to realize that I never want to be without her in my life. I have joked with her for several years that I plan to out live her, but God, I hope I never do.
Linda Lee Stokes, I love, want, and need you. That last one I have been loath to say for a long time but it as true as the other two and has been for more than thirty years, way longer probably if you total up all those other un-remembered lives.
Linda arrived here in Bloomington, Indiana a few days ago. She had just spent about a month in South Carolina with her family there. Dad Stokes passed away on April fifteenth and she drove to SC for his funeral and especially to help her mom and be with her brothers and sisters. I talked her into coming up to see me before she heads back to Houston. She convinced her mom to drive back to Houston with her and spend some time there with her and her sister Sarah, so she will head back to South Carolina again to pick up her mom before going back to Houston. This will be the first time my son Jon has seen his grandma in several years. I have not been with her for a long time either but hope to see her before this year is out.
Yesterday I began three days off with Linda. I rise early each day to write and post these blogs which means that I go to sleep pretty early but we will have more time together the next three days than we usually do and I plan to make them count. I have hurt and disappointed my wife as much as any man ever did a wife, most of us do so without really ever meaning to. But I hope thousands of loving and lusty poems, singing to her, and hugging and kissing her has made some if not all of that up to her. I have quit trying to prove to her that she is “my number one girl.” She will either believe that or not. All I can do is love her the best way I know how.
Three days together is always like a honeymoon for true lovers and we are that. For all our differences of opinion and varying views on things, this one thing we see eye to eye on, we love one another and have for the better part this journey, this life. As I jokingly say, you can kill a person and not get that long a sentence, or time flies when you are having a good time and even when you are not. We have shared so many good times and a few probably not so good ones too. Celine Dion sings, “But we have to know some bad times or our lives are incomplete.”
How Does A Moment Last Forever
Perhaps it is easier for me to forget those few times now than her but then I think that the great secret to happy living is to “Think Happy Thoughts.” And we cannot do that if we are constantly thinking thoughts that are not happy. We owe it to ourselves to forget the bad and sad thoughts. Forgiving and forgetting is not just for others but really for ourself. The one who matters most.
Most times I think there is only one girl, one boy, and that even they are One. And their name is “I Am.” Several quite popular religions keep shouting, “God is One” perhaps for all that they have gotten wrong, all of them, they got this one thing right. Have a happy Memorial Day Weekend. We plan to, my Linda and I, memorializing this love of this lifetime.
Your friend and fellow traveler,
The spiller of beans and sharer I hope of sweet dreams,