Blog 1439 – 08.29.2019
I am sure that many of you reading this have seen the TV and Movie Theater commercial with the camel proclaiming Wednesday as “Hump Day.” I am a guy quite unafraid as some of you readers already know to take this blog where angels fear to tread. I am no angel but a man, if also divine, and therefore freely talk about religion, politics, and sex. And why not, for on these we all have opinions and mine are in no way more astute nor valid than anyone else’s and should not be feared as either corrupting our nation’s young nor precipitating some revolutionary movement.
We are talking about Wednesday, yesterday being “Hump Day.” I think every day should be hump day. And ladies do not say, “You would, you are a guy.” Ladies and not so lady-like women like to hump too. Why even Dennis The Menace’s mom liked to wrestle with his dad with her shirt off on Sundays as Dennis revealed to their neighbor Mrs. Wilson in an over cookies and milk conversation. Though Mr. and Mrs. Wilson never had children of their own it was, I am sure, not for lack of trying.
Since I was a young lad, I have often lain looking up at the clouds floating by marveling and imagining that at that very instant all around the world people were humping their hearts out. If the wings a a butterfly in the jungles of an East African jungle can start a powerful hurricane it may very be that a little humping started this ole world spinning in the first place and keeps it spinning today.
Some may say, “That is quite crude and rude of you, Dave.” Nonsense, it is only an opinion and not a pointed one either but round and full floating in the sky like billowing clouds above that always remind me and did funny man Robin Williams of Reubenesque breasts. How I wish in that sad moment before he decided to take his own life that he could have entertained a more pleasant thought perhaps of a big beautiful pair floating by in the air. It works for me. Opinion-time again, I thing petting furry animals, other favorite things, and thinking happy thoughts helps us to live longer and if not, really makes the days we do get seem a lot more fun.
Lighten up church folks, sex is here to stay if we are and as the old joke goes, “If God made anything better than that She/He kept that for Herself.”
Happy Hump Day, and do celebrate it every day you can. With or without a partner. As Elvis sang in Jailhouse Rock, “If you can find a partner use a wooden chair.” But be careful of splinters. Just joking lads and ladies. They make much safer toys for that these days.
Your friend and fellow traveler,
Proponent of making everyday like Christmas, the Fourth of July, Hump Day,