The Purpose Of Pain

Blog 1087 – 08.17.2018

The Purpose Of Pain

When I was fifteen years old I wrote a poem inspired by the greatest pain I had experienced up to that point in my life. I wrote:

The Purpose Of Pain

The purpose of pain as I see it

All toll of one heart torn

Is to make the heart so tender

Each dying rose to mourn.

That first pain was over being rejected by my first kiss girlfriend for another young man a couple of years ahead of us in school. And though many might laugh at such deep love in a fourteen year old, I assure you it was a heart wrenching experience and I am not sure that I or anyone ever really gets over such a heartbreak but as my prophetic poem indicated, I think rather than hardening our hearts it can makes them even more tender. It is more often a hard shell that many build around their tender hearts that keeps love from flowing out or in that is the real problem with of that kind of pain.

I read recently that someone said the only way to deal with a painful situation is not to avoid the pain but to allow ourselves to go through it, to feel it in its entirety. In the wonderful movie Wind River two dads lose their Native American daughters as young women to murder. The first, comforting the second, tells him that all he learned from his pain and the grief counseling that he sought was not to shun the pain but to go through it and allow it to make him more tender and appreciative of all the people and things that he had left in his life each time he thought of all he had lost and that he knew he would never completely forget the pain. He said, “If he refused the pain he would also lose the wonderful memories of the lost. The only way to keep them was to face and work through the pain.”

I am continuing to experience the pain of life as we all do. My dear Mama took her own life three years after my daddy died because she was overcome by long time depression and I think a feeling of loneliness and helplessness. We will in most cases always float to the top of such feelings if we give them time and avail ourselves of the help of angels around us, visible and unseen. More than even the pain that takes our full attention we are surrounded by an ocean of love never meant to drown us but buoy us up. When you hear yourself crying “Make it stop” also remember to add, “Love, float me higher.” Don’t fight the water or the pain let it flow over you and float you to the surface. Let go and let the Universe show you Whose and Who you are.

Your friend and fellow traveler,

David White


It was said of Jesus, that he suffered in all points as we but yet without sin. Some think sin one thing, others another, many see it as a long list of rules and regulations impossible to keep. I think, the best meaning of sin is the literal interpretation of the Greek word used in the New Testament translated “sin” and that is “missing the mark.” Jesus did not miss the mark as he proved even amid the most terrible death imaginable he never stopped loving or letting love flow through him to others. Almost his last recorded utterance before his death was a prayer of forgiveness for those who crucified him. He let love float him up and above the drowning pain and we can too.

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