Blog 752 – 09.12.2017
Why I Enjoy Singing Karaoke

It is probably for the same reason that most of you do not, it forces me to practice and prepare to get up front and give it my very best. The first time I ever sang karaoke was at my twenty-fifth high school reunion. I attended the casual Friday evening event with my wife, opting out of the dressier stuffier Saturday evening more formal affair. Friday night was on a riverboat on the Tennessee River along the Chattanooga River Walk. They had a karaoke machine, no one was singing, the night was young, and most people need lots of booze to have courage enough to sing even in front of strangers let alone former classmates. Having left behind that “shy timid guy” I once was and having a “try anything attitude” when my wife asked me to sing her a song I headed up to the platform. It only took me a couple of minutes to pick out the perfect song. Not being at the time even fifty four, When I’m Sixty Four by the Beatles was the one. I had sung it with the album hundreds of times as a boy and figured I could not blow it too badly. All the notes and words came back to me as I crooned not only to my wife but for all the ladies. In those moments I felt like a rock star singing to charm the panties off my girl and all the former high school sweeties attending. I remembered that the highest form of praise for rockers was being pelted by panties as they sang. The number was successful even if those wearing panties kept them on. That night my wife more than rewarded me for my efforts. I had a feeling my karaoke career was just beginning.

Some years later I attended one of my wife’s bank Christmas parties in the home of her manager. A large karaoke machine was set up with a selection of songs. I opted for an Elvis number, Heart Break Hotel. I had never sung it in front of others before but thought I knew it. Was I ever wrong. There is no melody line in the music which means you have to have a good knowledge of where you are going with it to make it work. I did not and garbed the words and timing terribly but fortunately most everyone had had several drinks, the music was loud, and they mostly too scared or too sober to sing, so they all said I did a great job. But I knew better. That night, no special reward for singing when I got home, so I told my wife I wanted my own karaoke machine for Christmas. I was determined to never be unprepared again.

Since then I have been practicing and have over a hundred song I could confidently sing before anyone including President Trump if he should ask. I have gotten no such invitation and it would probably have to be on a Saturday since I have to work, but Mister President I am ready any Saturday that works for you – Have Karaoke machine will travel. That sounds not so strangely like one of my boyhood heroes, Paladin, from the Have Gun Will Travel CBS TV western series of the late nineteen fifties, early sixties.

I recently replaced my aging karaoke machine and hope to make a few CDs to share with friends. Be sure to get your orders in early. They will be priced to move. But billionaires will get a copy free. How about it President Trump, something for Melania’s Christmas stocking? I do a pretty hot, After The Lovin’, that is bound to get you pelted when you play it. No offense intended to anyone, especially the Trump family or any other billionaires, just having fun singing Karaoke, most of the time to myself.

Your friend and fellow traveler,
My name is easier to spell than Englebert Humperdinck,
David White

Oh, and I practice Heart Break Hotel to keep it sharp and ready, thank you, thank you very much.